JUMPING ON AND OFF GOOD DEEDS WAGON seems to be the popular theme in our world today. I want to open the discussion on whether or not it is best to maintain our values or choose the popular venue if it suits a certain issue to change how we appear to others.
Oh, I feel the hair rising on my arms as this one is a touchy subject. I will admit that I am a conservative value thinking person. I will sound bias in this discussion because I come from the old school of tradition, manners, family unity, and faith based values. I am not an old fogey however, and realize that I broke from some of the old traditions while maintaining some composure about changes. Let’s jump into this subject and maybe it will cause some thought provoking activity.
- What caused the “say what you think even if it disrespects the listener” attitude?
- Why are conservative values considered out of date by younger people?
- Have we made progress or regressive action with the new ideas and policies?
- Are we more united or divided by the actions demanding conservative values are not desired by the millennials and some younger people?
- Did we gain or lose by loosening up the disciplinary ways of our parents and even us as parents?
- Did we lose some of the values that have been practiced by the last generation in our path of “finding” ourselves?
I ask these questions to move our brain gears into movement. On the blog, I take us back to my good old days when tradition was honored, parents were respected, children were taught the value of faith, family, friendship, and community. Change is not all bad, but when changes distort our beliefs, values, and good manners, it can be very destructive.
I have attached a link to a great article and also the topics covered on becoming a better person. I believe in the goodness of humankind but I feel we are in danger of losing the very identity which makes us special and if we focus on returning to doing those acts of kindness and goodness, we will find a way to unite. Please click on the link if you want to read the entire article found in VeryWell Mind:
Let Go of Anger
Leverage Your Strengths
Use the “Stages of Change” Model
Take Care of Yourself
Learn to Be User-Friendly
Our relationships can create a haven from stress, and help us to become better people at the same time. They can also be a significant source of stress when there is conflict that is resolved poorly or left to fester. The beauty of this is that as we do the work it takes to become a better friend, partner, and family member, it can also be a path to becoming a better person.
Some of what you can do to both improve your relationships and improve yourself is to learn conflict resolution strategies. Being a good listener,understanding the other side when you are in conflict, learning anger management techniques. These things can all help us to be better versions of ourselves. They can also minimize stress we experience in relationships and make them stronger. And close relationships usually provide plenty of opportunities to practice these skills as you work on improving them, so you can perhaps even appreciate the opportunities when they arise and feel less upset.
Maybe it is from researching, reading, writing, and blogging I have been exposed to more expression of thoughts. I recently read an article which leaned more favorable to liberalism and while I disagreed with a lot in the article, it gave me a better understanding of what liberals see conservatives as rigid, unfeeling, tight lipped, and non flexible and they actually see themselves in a freer soul, more emotional and caring, expressive, and even more lovable than conservatives. I thought I might take this thought and challenge it with a comparison of how it used to be when a death of a neighbor occurred and how today people react to the same occurrence.
When someone passed away when I was growing up, there was a lot of emotion attached to the departure of the relative, neighbor, co-worker, or church member. My husband and I had a recent conversation at the differences of then and now and it reminded me that I see the same differences occurring in our society. Let me show you what I mean:
When a person passed away, the church and neighbors gathered to decide where the food was going to be taken for the family and friends. It was not if you were going to take food, it was what are you going to take…….Question for you? With a few exceptions of some churches still carrying on this tradition, when have you seen this display of consideration for the grieving family?
When a person was buried in the cemetery it was customary to visit the graves and place flowers on a regular basis, especially the surviving family members. It was not if you were going to visit and take flowers but who was in charge of which holiday or special day of remembrance…….Question for you? When and whose grave do you visit and take time to show your respect and when was the last time you took flowers or placed a flag for the veterans?
When you have a friend that is facing death with a terminal illness or a lingering condition, it used to be people went to see their old friends and/or relatives. It seems as if people run from that responsibility of being a friend and want to stick their head in the sand. Question for you? When have you visited a school mate, a friend, a relative that was so good to you in years past when you found out they had cancer, other illness including dementia or Alzheimers? What is stopping you or me?
NOW FOR MY DEEPER THOUGHT: I am not sitting in a judgment seat or I would have to be found guilty too. I am pointing out one of the reasons I see a jump off the good neighbor wagon and I feel this has led to a demise of those traditions and good deeds since maybe our children and grandchildren haven’t seen us showing how much others mean to us. May we stop and blaming all of the divisiveness in our world on younger folks as we should first remember when we do something good…..we probably learned those good deeds from our parents. LIVE LIFE, LOVE LIFE, LIVE LIFE TO THE FULLEST BY GIVING OF OURSELVES SO THAT OTHERS WILL WANT TO MIMIC OUR ACTIONS.
(C) COPYRIGHT 2012-2019 Arline Miller of Sipping Cups of Inspiration with all rights and privileges reserved. Third party material if known, including photos, is sourced to the original location.