JUMPING ON AND OFF THE GOOD DEEDS WAGON is a look into how the disappearance of tradition and older values may have an effect on how we treat each other. It may not appeal to all of my readers but some will get the message, but it is one to provoke some thoughts on today’s world. Please join me on the blog and share it with others. #blog #amwriting #traditions #love #life #conservative #oldfashioned



JUMPING ON AND OFF THE GOOD DEEDS WAGON is a look into how the disappearance of tradition and older values may have an effect on how we treat each other. It may not appeal to all of my readers but some will get the message, but it is one to provoke some thoughts on today’s world. Please join me on the blog and share it with others. #blog #amwriting #traditions #love #life #conservative #oldfashioned


JUMPING ON AND OFF GOOD DEEDS WAGON seems to be the popular theme in our world today. I want to open the discussion on whether or not it is best to maintain our values or choose the popular venue if it suits a certain issue to change how we appear to others.

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Oh, I feel the hair rising on my arms as this one is a touchy subject. I will admit that I am a conservative value thinking person. I will sound bias in this discussion because I come from the old school of tradition, manners, family unity, and faith based values. I am not an old fogey however, and realize that I broke from some of the old traditions while maintaining some composure about changes. Let’s jump into this subject and maybe it will cause some thought provoking activity.

  • What caused the “say what you think even if it disrespects the listener” attitude? 
  • Why are conservative values considered out of date by younger people?
  • Have we made progress or regressive action with the new ideas and policies?
  • Are we more united or divided by the actions demanding conservative values are not desired by the millennials and some younger people?
  • Did we gain or lose by loosening up the disciplinary ways of our parents and even us as parents?
  • Did we lose some of the values that have been practiced by the last generation in our path of “finding” ourselves?

I ask these questions to move our brain gears into movement. On the blog, I take us back to my good old days when tradition was honored, parents were respected, children were taught the value of faith, family, friendship, and community. Change is not all bad, but when changes distort our beliefs, values, and good manners, it can be very destructive.


I have attached a link to a great article and also the topics covered on becoming a better person. I believe in the goodness of humankind but I feel we are in danger of losing the very identity which makes us special and if we focus on returning to doing those acts of kindness and goodness, we will find a way to unite. Please click on the link if you want to read the entire article found in VeryWell Mind:

How to Become a Better Person

Let Go of Anger

Support Others

Leverage Your Strengths

Use the “Stages of Change” Model

Take Care of Yourself

Learn to Be User-Friendly

Our relationships can create a haven from stress, and help us to become better people at the same time. They can also be a significant source of stress when there is conflict that is resolved poorly or left to fester. The beauty of this is that as we do the work it takes to become a better friend, partner, and family member, it can also be a path to becoming a better person.

Some of what you can do to both improve your relationships and improve yourself is to learn conflict resolution strategies. Being a good listener,understanding the other side when you are in conflict, learning anger management techniques. These things can all help us to be better versions of ourselves. They can also minimize stress we experience in relationships and make them stronger. And close relationships usually provide plenty of opportunities to practice these skills as you work on improving them, so you can perhaps even appreciate the opportunities when they arise and feel less upset.



Maybe it is from researching, reading, writing, and blogging I have been exposed to more expression of thoughts. I recently read an article which leaned more favorable to liberalism and while I disagreed with a lot in the article, it gave me a better understanding of what liberals see conservatives as rigid, unfeeling, tight lipped, and non flexible and they actually see themselves in a freer soul, more emotional and caring, expressive, and even more lovable than conservatives. I thought I might take this thought and challenge it with a comparison of how it used to be when a death of a neighbor occurred and how today people react to the same occurrence.

When someone passed away when I was growing up, there was a lot of emotion attached to the departure of the relative, neighbor, co-worker, or church member. My husband and I had a recent conversation at the differences of then and now and it reminded me that I see the same differences occurring in our society. Let me show you what I mean:

When a person passed away, the church and neighbors gathered to decide where the food was going to be taken for the family and friends. It was not if you were going to take food, it was what are you going to take…….Question for you? With a few exceptions of some churches still carrying on this tradition, when have you seen this display of consideration for the grieving family?

When a person was buried  in the cemetery it was customary to visit the graves and place flowers on a regular basis, especially the surviving family members. It was not if you were going to visit and take flowers but who was in charge of which holiday or special day of remembrance…….Question for you?  When and whose grave do you visit and take time to show your respect and when was the last time you took flowers or placed a flag for the veterans?

When you have a friend that is facing death with a terminal illness or a lingering condition, it used to be people went to see their old friends and/or relatives. It seems as if people run from that responsibility of being a friend and want to stick their head in the sand. Question for you? When have you visited a school mate, a friend, a relative that was so good to you in years past when you found out they had cancer, other illness including dementia or Alzheimers? What is stopping you or me?

NOW FOR MY DEEPER THOUGHT: I am not sitting in a judgment seat or I would have to be found guilty too. I am pointing out one of the reasons I see a jump off the good neighbor wagon and I feel this has led to a demise of those traditions and good deeds since maybe our children and grandchildren haven’t seen us showing how much others mean to us. May we stop and blaming all of the divisiveness in our world on younger folks as we should first remember when we do something good…..we probably learned those good deeds from our parents. LIVE LIFE, LOVE LIFE, LIVE LIFE TO THE FULLEST BY GIVING OF OURSELVES SO THAT OTHERS WILL WANT TO MIMIC OUR ACTIONS.

(C) COPYRIGHT 2012-2019 Arline Miller of Sipping Cups of Inspiration with all rights and privileges reserved. Third party material if known, including photos, is sourced to the original location.




IN THE BLINK OF AN EYE is not meant to be morbid, but a reminder to value each life, our lives included, as life can be changed or even ended in a blink of an eye. I share personal stories and a lesson to fill each moment of life as if it is the first or even the last one. Life is unique to each one of us and is to be cherished. #blog #lifelessons #life #love #positivity #amwriting



DID YOU FORGET WHAT DAY IT IS? Today’s blog brings that question to the focus of how would it feel to wake up and not know what day it is, who is standing next to you or even where you are. This is the nightmare of Alzheimers disease and how a daughter can give up her life to take care of her Dad. Please join us on the blog and share this post with others. #alzheimersdisease #alzheimerscare #daughterslove #life #health #blog


DID YOU FORGET WHAT DAY IT IS? This may seem like a silly question but today’s blog is dedicated to a subject dear to my heart and it hurts to even talk about it. It is important, so let me begin. TODAY is the day we discuss ALZHEIMER’S DISEASE. Why would I feel it a subject for my blog. I am going to be my usual up front self and discuss my daughter’s journey facing day to day with her hero, her Dad, living with Alzheimer’s disease. Missy’s Dad and I were high school sweethearts, were married two weeks after high school graduation, lived together for over seventeen years, divorced, and both of us remarried.

No, this is not a story of my life with Ralph but it is give you a base of why this is so important to address how this “thief” of life came sneaking into Ralph’s life and totally stole my daughter’s Dad from a normal life of aging and living. I want to give you a recap of the man who has become a prisoner of this disease and I think you will understand why I use the word thief in the description.


Ralph has always worked hard and in a highly physical occupation. The irony of this is he graduated with an accounting degree so he could have been in an office and not out in the elements working with lumber building pallets and then on to scrap metal. Just like the strangeness of this devastating disease, his decision to work with his hands, arms, back, and legs was strange in itself. That is if you don’t know the man himself. Wood crafting and seeing it made into something has fascinated him all of his life.

To see Missy with her Dad and hear her plans to donate her vehicle she had to leave behind to someone or an organization along with donating to the Alzheimer’s association, please click on this link. Give all you can to her heart felt cause or even a small donation will be greatly appreciated.

Go Fund Me Page: Alzheimers Takes. Help Us Give.

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I have heard of the triggers of dementia and a lot of times, an injury or health issue can set the disease into the train wrecking of the brain and daily living tasks. When several people, including Missy and me, noticed repetition of daily accounts/stories, at first it seemed simply aging but as time progressed, more and more signs that something was not quite right. I will not cover all of the occurrences at this time but loss of time, inaccuracies of where and why he was waking up at 4 am and getting dressed and going to work thinking it was the normal time of this trip, forgetting to eat normally, and on and on gave clues this was not the average actions.

By Stephanie Specht on November 15, 2017
Everyday life can be a stressful ordeal for a person with a dementia-related disorder. As the disease progresses, behaviors can occur that arenot always easily understood by family or caregivers.

Although it can be hard to understand why people with dementia act the way they do, it is important to remember that your loved one may not be acting out of ill will. It may be symptom of the disease and a changing brain.

However, once the underlying cause is identified or understood, the behavior can may be able to be prevented or at least decreased.

Common behaviors associated with dementia disorders include:

  • Agitation
  • Aggression
  • Repetitive actions
  • Verbal outbursts
  • Sleep disturbances
  • Hallucinations, delusions or paranoia
  • Wandering or wanting to go home
  • Hoarding or rummaging
  • Abusive behavior
  • Emotional changes
  • Mood swings
  • Depression

Generally, people with dementia become agitated due to three potential trigger categories: Medical, physiological and/or environmental.

Medical Triggers

Medical triggers can include sickness, fever or pain, but it can also include issues that you might not initially think about, such as:

  • Medication side effects
  • Sores, open wounds, pressure areas or bruises
  • Earache, toothache or headache

Psychological Triggers

It is also important to remember that some people with a dementia illness cannot verbally express their pain or give accurate information about how they feel.

You cannot expect a “real” answer if you ask, “How do you feel?” However, they will express it non-verbally by exhibiting a change in behavior or functioning level.

Environmental Triggers

People suffering from dementia also have a hard time processing changes in their surroundings. A move can be a little disconcerting for anyone, but for a person with dementia even rearranging objects in a room can cause agitation.

Other environmental triggers to keep in mind include:

  • New or unfamiliar caregivers or separation from loved ones
  • Lack of routine, such as no “agenda” to help orient to surroundings
  • No activity, no stimulation and/or isolation
  • Too much activity or sensory overload
  • Lack of orientation cues, such as ways to find the bedroom or bathroom
  • Lighting that might be too bright, not bright enough or creates shadows
  • White noise such as a lawn mower outside or an appliance humming inside the home
  • Room temperature (too hot or too cold)
  • TV or radio that is left on all the time can cause confusion
  • Clothes too tight, shoes too small or hair pulled too tight
  • Clutter

In addition, things that we hardly notice as we go about our day-to-day activities can agitate a patient with dementia. If you are having a hard time figuring out what might be bothering your loved one, take a moment and observe your surroundings for the following triggers:

  • Shiny floors: What might look nice and clean to you could look like ice or standing water to a dementia patient.
  • Mirrors: When a dementia patient looks into a mirror they often do not recognize themselves or they can get “lost” in the depth of the mirror.
  • Color contrast: Too much or too little color contrast can de disorienting for dementia patients. For example, an all-white bathroom can be disorienting because it can make it difficult to see the difference between the toilet set and the wall or the floor. And too much contrast can be problematic as well. Two-toned carpet, checker-board tile or black door mats can look like holes in the floor to a dementia patient.

If you are a caregiver and you are having trouble identifying the causes of your loved one’s discomfort or agitation, talk to your health care provider about potential triggers. Some simple changes could make all the difference for you and your loved one.

This article was reviewed by Lisa Hebert-Meritt, COTA/L, CDP, CADDCT, Carilion Clinic Home Care, program lead for Carilion’s Alzheimer’s Disease and Dementia Management Home Care Program.

Learn more about the seven stages of dementia.


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As a blogger, I usually don’t self promote, but this is a cause that I have witnessed the tremendous sacrifices of my daughter who left abruptly without thought of her life, had to give up her place she loved, have all of her belongings shipped and no place to store them or even set them up, and leave her vehicle which is a good car without having time to sell it. She is the primary caregiver and wants to keep her Dad at his home he built. She deserves help to help her Dad and others at the same time. Don’t you think this is the day to give? DON’T FORGET WHAT DAY IT IS…..IT’S THE DAY TO GIVE. PLEASE.

(C) COPYRIGHT Arline Miller 2012-2018 with all rights and privileges reserved. Third party material is sourced, if known to original location for credit reference.

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