I have given this post a lot of thought. It seems we are struggling to accept others and this struggle has brought a lot of discord among all people. Politics have taken the place of parenting as we are persuaded to think this way or another. As children, our source of influence was simpler. We had parents who wanted us to behave in a certain way, respect or even disrespect according to how they felt, and our faith had a lot more to do with how they believed than a personal relationship with a Higher Power. Today, I look at the pros and cons of thinking on our own and finding ways of accepting ourselves in order for a better assessment of how we feel about others.
Let us begin with the quote from Lucille Ball:
How can we expect to love others with their imperfections if we do not accept our imperfections? How can we accept love from others when we are incapable of accepting self love?
I looked at this perception of love and I know this is the key to a more peaceful transition. This quote from John Spence is reflective of my thoughts:
Maybe if we get alone with ourselves, accept the good qualities we possess, as well as the imperfections which may be inherent or here’s a thought…We can work on ourselves first to improve our ability to co-exist with others if we obtain a peaceful environment about ourselves. I have assembled some questions to begin the contemplation of whether we truly love ourselves as a person:
Here are some thought provoking questions:
1- If I met someone exactly like myself, would I like them or would I find fault?
2-Could I carry on a conversation with me and find it interesting, boring, or antagonizing?
3-When I am alone, am I content or do I try to find alternate ways to avoid myself by eliminating alone time?
4-When looking in a mirror, do I look at myself realistically or do I imagine a different person staring back at me such as a younger, leaner, athletic, or a more contented person?
5-Do I value my thoughts and write down my thoughts or do I depend only on others written words?
6-Do I share my thoughts or creative ideas on how to do something with others or offer to teach things I know how to do well?
7- Do I always find myself in contradiction to surroundings, events, news, books, movies, etc.?
8-Can I compliment myself when I exhibit good qualities or do I shy away from personal achievement or recognition?
9-Do I see my life as a success, even with occasional set backs or do I feel like a failure?
10-Can I express love for myself to do the following instructions as expressed by Dr. Steve Maraboli?
This self evaluation is necessary for us to be fair in how we accept others. It would be impossible to accept others if we cannot accept ourselves. We, as well as others, will never be perfect. Imperfection is a part of love, self and expressing love to and for others. In life, the average looking girl can be happier than a homecoming queen sometimes. The reasoning is the bar was never pushed so high for the average girl but so high for the homecoming queen that maintaining happiness is not sustainable as time and wrinkles come. Live in reality, love the uniqueness of each individual by initially accepting yourself.
(C) Copyright 2012 -2022 Arline Miller of Sipping Cups of Inspiration with all rights reserved and to be used with permission. Third party material is sourced to original location if known for credit references.
As a blogger and writer, there are times in between events and I occupy myself. Always at this time, this post comes to my mind about the time in between the Crucifixion and the Resurrection. It seems worthy of reposting this year. Happy Easter to all of us who celebrate this holy holiday and may each of us have a beautiful reason to know why we celebrate it.
This is a repost from 2014 but I found it to be appropriate as we move into Good Friday. TODAY THE WORDS are THE TIME IN BETWEEN. We have obligations, appointments, meetings, scheduled events, etc. which have specific times set aside throughout our days, weeks, and months. We write them down and plan to be on time and sometimes we schedule several places to be on the same day to make the most of our time. While doing this, we have some unavoidable down time or some time in between. We find ourselves with a half hour, an hour or sometimes two with nothing to do. What do we do with our time in between two events? Some of us bring our iPads, books, puzzles, etc. and fill our time either wisely or just idling with very little productivity. This made me have a deeper thought about this Easter holiday. When the events occurred on Good Friday and with the promise from Jesus to His followers He would rise on the third day; how did they fill the time in between? Did they sit around and mourn Jesus’s death as we do today when one of our loved ones die? The tomb was sealed so they could only visit the outside. Did they stay watchful or did they have the confidence to wait the days out? How did the conversation go between all of the disciples? Did they fear their safety knowing others had seen the Lord’s strength during his torturous death? Did they reminisce about His miracles Jesus had performed? How did they fill the time in between?
Easter cross All of us may know what happened on Easter Sunday with all of the celebration and miraculous resurrection; but my mind has been directed to the time in between and here is what I feel. Our lives are actually time in between. We are born into this world and then we die. All of our life is this time between birth and death and what we do is important to prepare for our resurrection into Eternity. How do we fill our time in between or in other words, what do we do with our lives? Do we fill our time with productivity and good works or do we idly fill our time with nonsense and useless activities? Do we learn, earn, live, and love? Do we reach out to help others find their way? We are taught about Good Friday and Easter, but I think we need to spend some of our time understanding how important the time in between was. Life is here for us and while we show reverence and love for Jesus’s sacrifice for us; let us use our time in between wisely. Happy Easter to all and a Happy In Between Time to fill with goodness.
For positive affirmation with “the power of positive thinking” I am including a short article for you to read: The Power of Positive Thinking
“Your attitude, not your aptitude, will determine your altitude.”
Did you know that some of the world’s most successful people – including professional athletes, actors, business-people, artists, and spiritual leaders, attribute their success to one thing, above all else?
Its called “the power of positive thinking,” and more and more regular people are harnessing this incredible force to achieve happiness, personal success and abundance in their lives.
If you want to successfully change your attitude, it is important to know that, just like a magnet, your thoughts, expectations, and beliefs attract everyone and everything that enters into your life, both positive and negative.
How To Be Happy Does anger, worry, fear, anxiety, and/or depression lead your emotional state and thought patterns?
If so, then experiences validating these thoughts are exactly what you will attract into your life. Good thing for you, there is a very effective solution.
What is the secret to making the power of positive thinking work for me?
Meditation. In order to manifest positive experiences into your life, you must change your thoughts, which must be done from the root: the subconscious layers of your mind.
Once meditation melts all of the layers of worry, anxiety, depression, and fear clogging up your thought processes, your new-found mind-mastery, with crystal clear thinking, and positive mental attitude allows you easy manifestation of anything you want, whether it be love, good health, wealth, more friends, or success.
Easter hope Scripture Excerpt from The Bible:
John 20:16-18 Jesus said to her, “Mary.” She turned toward him and cried out in Aramaic, “Rabboni!” (which means Teacher). Jesus said, “Do not hold on to me, for I have not yet returned to the Father. Go instead to my brothers and tell them, ‘I am returning to my Father and your Father, to my God and your God.’ ” Mary Magdalene went to the disciples with the news: “I have seen the Lord!” And she told them that he had said these things to her. positive thoughts
(c) copyright 2012-2022 Arline Lott Miller. The material here copyrighted, with all rights and privileges reserved. Third party material/photos are sourced when known to original location for credit reference.
During this burst of Spring, we have planted the herb planters and it is such a sign of future life and freshness to our meals, I decided to pull this popular post. I love seeing my friends getting into the garden phase and also getting our yards in shape with new straw, fertilizers, new plants, and trimming up for maximum blooms. It makes me remember those are not here any more like my Mom who spent her days in her garden beds. Sweet memories and I cherish each of her plants that live on in our yards. Have a beautiful spring and don’t forget to get some soil on your hands or as this post suggests, Gardener’s Gloves. Good gardening produces tasty and healthy foods so we can make great salads and other dishes. I sometimes return to older posts for refreshment of thought. I dedicated it to a great gardener Linda Christian and who is genuinely missed by so many of us
THE GARDENER’S GLOVE was a popular message and I love the lessons behind it. We have a beautiful growing container garden this year. I have mentioned our garden before but in watching our “crop” grow, I am amazed at how the rain, the pruning, and the feedings affect the amount of growth. It led me back to how proper care of ourselves can affect our growth and especially our health. Stay tuned and when we begin the harvesting, I will share some recipes and photos.
TODAY THE WORDS are THE GARDENER’S GLOVE This topic may seem a little strange coming from a lady whose husband does all of our landscaping and who considers herself blessed to not have to pull weeds (but he doesn’t do a lot of that with his routine weed control). I have several FB friends who grow beautiful gardens (Linda Christian whose birthday is today and she can make us envious of her gardening skills and beautiful spirit of sharing with others) , some who are in their rose gardens and flower beds, and there are my friends who do not like the outdoor gardening at all. I love flowers and there is nothing better to eat than fresh home grown vegetables but I think my resistance stems from my childhood.
Let’s return to my childhood to give you my thoughts. In order to make some money, my Mother grew turnip and mustard greens in our back garden. Before school, and sometimes in the bitter cold, we would go to the garden, gather the greens which were ready, clean them off and bundle with string. Off to the grocery store they would go and off to school we would go. It wasn’t the work as I had too much energy; we didn’t use gloves. In those days, you used your hands (maybe others had enough money to buy gloves; not us). It was the smell of the greens on my hands and mind you, I washed my hands several times and they were as clean as they were going to be. I see my husband prepare, by putting on gloves, before he goes out to do yard work, gardening, and/or pruning. He is very particular about how the gloves have to fit as a proper fit will not slow him down. He jokes with other guys that his wife does yard work. He says “She tells me where to put everything and walks back in the house.” He smiles when he says it but I know he loves being in the yard and in control of its beauty. I am usually the one who is in charge of the interior of our home and I love doing it.
Now for the deeper thought….as important as gloves are to a gardener or landscaper…..gloves of life are as important to our being. Gloves are a protective covering to avoid scratches, cuts and sometimes bites from insects. They wrap around the hand and fingers securely and when properly fitted, are an extension of our very bodies. They become a second skin in other words. Our “character” is a pair of gloves of life. We start, at an early age, to develop (or put on) our character which comprises of several things: our personality; our integrity; our work ethics and our moral ethics (may be the same or sometimes not); our nurturing persona; and our spirituality. With the proper gloves of life, we can garden our souls and protect ourselves from the scratches, bites, and burns which the garden of life brings. I am not discounting God’s influence in our gardens, but we as His Children, need to put on our gloves and protect ourselves too. Good gardening, my friends, and don’t forget your gloves.
FEATURED BIBLE VERSE:Genesis 2:9
And out of the ground the Lord God made to spring up every tree that is pleasant to the sight and good for food. The tree of life was in the midst of the garden, and the tree of the knowledge of good and evil.
(C) Copyright 2012-2022 Arline Lott Miller. The material here copyrighted, use only by permission. Third party material, if known, is sourced to the original location for reference.
While Cupid is getting its quiver filled with romance arrows, it made me pause and wonder what kind of accuracy does Cupid have? Have you ever thought how many arrows made their mark in the lovers’ hearts? Do the lovers know how they were targeted to be together? While many are wondering if Cupid even knows their location and how long is it going to take for him to load his bow of love and for him to take aim in their direction. Today, this blogger who feels she was shot by Cupid’s arrow not in February but on a hot August day back in 1999.
Wikipedia describes Cupid in the following way:
Cupid is winged, allegedly because lovers are flighty and likely to change their minds, and boyish because love is irrational. His symbols are the arrow and torch, “because love wounds and inflames the heart.” These attributes and their interpretation were established by late antiquity, as summarized by Isidore of Seville (d. 636 AD) in his Etymologiae. Cupid is also sometimes depicted blindfolded and described as blind, not so much in the sense of sightless—since the sight of the beloved can be a spur to love—as blinkered and arbitrary. As described by Shakespeare in A Midsummer Night’s Dream (1590s):Cupid sculpture by Bertel Thorvaldsen
Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind And therefore is winged Cupid painted blind. Nor hath love’s mind of any judgement taste; Wings and no eyes figure unheedy haste. And therefore is love said to be a child Because in choice he is so oft beguiled.
I thought I would share a personal story of my own when Cupid (disguised as a dear friend of mine) brought me right in the path of love’s arrows. My friend who I will call Cupid worked with the man who was destined to be my love for the rest of my life. She, knowing I had experienced the let down of love and romance, kept saying to me on the phone that every time Greg said something, she thought of me.
Over a span of almost 3 months, she tried every trick in the book and kept shooting arrows but I dodged them. I kept throwing the arrows back with every possible objection but she wouldn’t give up. Finally, in an effort to get her off my back, I agreed to meeting him on a visit to see her. I thought, I go, I meet, and then I could say I wasn’t interested or even better, he wouldn’t be interested in me. So the next Tuesday, I had to go through the town they worked in and arranged a lunch date with her with plans of quickly meeting him. Oh yeah, I thought I was so smart and cunning. Her plan was destined to fail. In all fairness, Greg was thinking the same thing. He was ready to get her to stop talking about this Arline. I find it so ironic that she was working us both and we both had the same mindset…..Don’t need romance…..Don’t want the hassle of another relationship…..And we were ready to shut up “cupid”.
The actual story of how it worked out is hilarious and I will save it for another day because there are many facets of that fated day with both Greg and I not getting a look at each other, thinking that the other was not interested, and that this was going to be easier to resolve than we thought. All miscommunication until we met. I couldn’t imagine all the lovers that have been hit by Cupid’s arrow, but I will tell you that once Greg walked out the door of his office and we took one look at each other, that lil Cupid shot those arrows into our hearts…we have been in love with each other since that time. Cupid sat in a corner watching us as we talked as if we had known each other all of our lives.
22 years later, we are together, as husband and wife of soon to be 21 years, and if ever two people were meant to be together, we are. We blended our families and what matters most, is we have a marriage of God’s inclusion. We may kid about how we met, but we know God played a part in sending love via our friend. Nuff said!
For the entire article 7 Ways Your Love Can Last Forever go to this link:
Respect is the cornerstones of our relationship. We may not always see things the same way, but we respect the ability to have different thoughts and ideas. We never put each other down to others or to each other. There is no faster way to erode a relationship.
2. Keep an Open Door Policy
Allowing your partner to share how they view and experience an event, and how they are feeling without judgment creates an environment of trust. As important as it is to share, it is just as important to listen and to really hear what the other is saying. This creates a healthy dialogue and a strong foundation.
Shared laughter can bond an experience and create great memories.
Let us continue on!
3. Don’t Lose Yourself in the Relationship
You are your own person with your own feelings and thoughts. You had your own friends before you met. If you give them all up for your spouse or romantic partner, you are snuffing out part of who you are and you may feel resentment later. My husband goes bowling with his friends weekly. It’s his time to be away from “us” and hang out with his buddies. I enjoy time with my friends too and then we then look forward to being together as a couple even more.
4. Remember Who You Fell in Love With
Don’t try to change your partner to a version of them you think they should be. It is a lose/lose proposition. Not only is it not really possible, it causes resentment. Remember the reasons you fell in love in the first place. Honor that person. If someone has to bend over backward to make you happy, or you have to do it for them, your relationship has lost its authenticity.
5. Tickle Your Funny Bones
Laughter is a stress reducer and an energy infuser. Shared laughter can bond an experience and create great memories. My husband and I always look for little ways to make each other laugh. Humor in a relationship makes being together more enjoyable. When you are not together, thinking about a time when you were laughing and having fun will make you smile and feel closer to your partner.
6. Put Love on the Calendar
Date nights are important to keep a relationship fresh. It keeps a couple from stagnating with the same boring routine. You don’t have to spend a lot of money to have a special night together. It can be as simple as dinner and a movie at home, or going out, and can be elaborate as well if it fits your budget. What matters is scheduling it so you both have something to look forward to. We like to record our favorite shows during the week and watch them together. One night a week we plan dinner out. Phones and computers are put away! Keep the date on the calendar, get a sitter if you have kids, and bring on the romance and fun that is part of dating, no matter how long you have been together.
7. A Little Appreciation Goes a Long Way!
Expressing gratitude to each other every day will keep you close. We share with each other at mealtime, telling each other something about our day that was special that we are grateful for. And we always try to notice the efforts the other made for us, even if it’s just doing the dishes, taking out the trash or washing the car. Showing appreciation for the little things that seem routine makes us look for ways to help each other out even more. Gratitude has a way of opening up your heart. Many of the things that may have annoyed us in the past aren’t even noticed anymore. That’s something to be grateful for!
Note from me, Arline Miller: Love can be instantly projected but true love lasts when the initial fantasy becomes reality and the heart accepts the truth of love is acceptance, growth, being a constant in life, and even more, a forgiving heart. May Cupid find your heart’s forever love but may God sustain your love is my Valentines Wish for You!
(C) Copyright 2012-2022 Arline Miller of Sipping Cups of Inspiration and Reinvention Queen with all rights and privileges reserved. Third party material is sourced, if known, to original location and author for credit references.
2021 Holiday Message from Arline Miller, blogger for Sipping Cups of Inspiration: As we were hanging our interior wreath which has some of the vintage ornaments we display in a high position to keep safe, I straightened some of the ornaments and noticed the Raggedy Ann and Andy was broken. I guess it happened after we took it down. My heart wouldn’t allow me to take it down so I turned it to a position the broken part was not visible. It happens and makes this post more relevant in life as well. Have a Merry Christmas and let us pray for a Happy New Year keeping all of us safe and sharing peace in this world.
Since we are blessed with nine grandchildren and one of them still in toddler stage, I bypassed putting up our traditional tree and went with an interesting Cardinal Tree with hand painted birdhouses by the grandchildren with a Granddaddy and Nana two hole birdhouse as the topper. No breakable ornaments to worry about. We had one of the grands here with us yesterday (in the photo) who thought the birds looked real and the tree was awesome. It reminded me of this post I wrote in 2016 about the similarity between broken ornaments and broken lives. Maybe it needs repeating. May your holidays be filled with many moment of love and may all of your ornaments and lives stay in one piece.
Here is the original blog message: BROKEN ORNAMENTS ARE LIKE BROKEN LIVES
TODAY THE WORDS are BROKENORNAMENTS. On this morning, my mind went to a place of remembrance of how it feels to lose something or as you will see “someone”. A lot of times in my writing, in order to put feelings in simpler terms, I use what I can replacement memories. If it is something we can relate to everyday or normal events, it is somehow easier to get a point across to others or at least it can make common sense. Most of us have our Christmas trees, or if not, we have occasions which have ornaments or displays which have a value to them and to us when we show them to the world. As a Christian, we have the decorated Christmas tree to celebrate Christmas season. For most of us, we start early collecting the ornaments, and even though the monetary worth is usually low; the emotional worth can be priceless. We unwrap them very carefully and hang them and a lot of Wow, Ooh, and Aah’s are heard as the ornaments are hung. Some have their “spots” to be hung; some even are hung in order. We add new ones each year but it is the older ones we cherish more and are so protective. My thoughts bring me to a sad thought of opening a box of ornaments, however carefully wrapped and cared for, finding one broken or even more than one and it is devastating. It doesn’t matter how many other wonderful, shiny ornaments we have; it is the loss of this one which takes our heart and crushes it. Even though the tree will still be beautiful, we know one of the best ornaments is no longer going to hang around and allow us to look at it and recall the years it has been around. This photo occurred a few days ago and it was so ironic that it would be this ornament that I had bought when my daughter’s cat became intrigued by the ornaments on the tree and decided to knock them off and push them down the stairs. After all of these years, about 20 that I have had that funny ornament, it came apart while hanging it and broke.
I see the same thing in life and now for the thought given to my heart…..Life is like the Christmas tree. We start life with a tree with some ornaments and we begin to add ornaments such as family and friends. Our tree begins with few and usually ends up with many lovely additions or “ornaments”. We, as loving people, take care of our “ornaments” by taking care of our siblings, starting our own families, and making sure our parents (the oldest ornaments and highly cherished) are cared for by wrapping them with love and care. Once in a while, one of the newer ornaments fall suddenly, without warning and are broken beyond repair and it is a tragedy. Some of the ornaments age and have to be cared for and repaired. They become fragile and we handle them carefully. When they finally break, and we can no longer have them on our tree; we feel their absence; we gaze at the tree and remember the missing ornaments while enjoying the new ornaments such as grandchildren, nieces and nephews, and new friends. It is impossible to tell when an ornament is going to break; all we can do is carefully wrap and enjoy each breathtaking moment we can share with them while we have them to enjoy. Live life; love life; and live life to the fullest by cherishing each wonderful moment and when you have a chance to say I Love You; Say It!
FEATURED BIBLE VERSE:
John 14:1-4 “Let not your hearts be troubled. Believe in God; believe also in me. In my Father’s house are many rooms. If it were not so, would I have told you that I go to prepare a place for you? And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and will take you to myself, that where I am you may be also. And you know the way to where I am going.”
(c) Copyright 2012-2021 Arline Lott Miller. The material here copyrighted, use only by permission. Third party material is sourced to original location if known for reference credit.
Today, instead of reinventing food, I thought of how many times in life do we try to reinvent ourselves. I wondered when is good…good enough? As a young lady, I dared to go into industries that were heavily populated with men. I excelled, not due to a lot of support from my male counterparts, but sheer determination. I watched them, I learned from them, I had to go toe to toe with them, I held my own, I succeeded. I said all of that to summarize, did that make me equal or superior? Not really, as I have learned a valuable lesson. We are not in competition with males or females; we are in competition with ourselves.
What do I mean, you ask? Allow me to dig deeper and I think it will become clearer. If I am a runner and I am timing myself. I am competing with the last timed run. If I am a swimmer, I am competing against my best time. It doesn’t matter how fast another swimmer or runner is at this moment, I can only measure if I am swimming or running faster than my last or best time. I am only as good as I can improve my individual efforts. Does that make sense now?
I love to cook but I also admire several fine chefs but I don’t measure my dishes by their shows. I measure it by my results, my successes, and yes, my failures. I may feel I surpassed their dishes or I may feel like they outdid me by a mile or a squash’s length. This brings me to a thought process to get us to a point When Good Is Good Enough:
My Good is Good Enough!
I have competed with my own personal achievements and sometimes I win and sometimes I have to rethink my strategy.
I am a realist with an optimistic outlook. If I don’t succeed the first time, second or even third time but I try harder each time, I move closer to the finish line and I know eventually I will succeed.
I look at life as I see it without so many expectations. Example: I am not a good singer but I love to sing but I realize that I am a limited talent (LOL) and sing when I am not in a public forum but the car is my stadium and I have put on many great performances (my rating, not anyone else’s).
I love humor about my limitations and/or lack of talent in areas I have never been a super techie. This however, has not kept me from working with computer techs/programmers. I get what I want programmed and can solve problems and have good visuals. I have a great time telling those tech savvy folks to put it in my language and I will give them my perspective. See My Good is Good Enough. Their Good is Good Enough. Together Our Good is Good Enough.
Knowing each person has excellent talents in certain fields is a big chunk of wisdom. Knowing each person has limitations and weak areas is universal wisdom and knowledge. Example: A Rocket Scientist has abilities and knowledge as well as strategic training but probably only a few has been successful in simple feats of life as cooking or changing a light bulb. Give me two remotes to work between them and I show you how irritating that is to me. However, knowing that I have to sometimes do this task, I have learned how to do it. So, by focusing on things I am not comfortable with, My Good is Good Enough.
Accepting all of me, good and bad, weak and strong, intensive and scattered thought patterns, organized and out of order thoughts, and kind and even blunt speech are facets of me. My Good is Good Enough.
Deciding when and where I can develop even better ideas, practices, habits, and actions is healthy when it comes from within and not because I am measuring myself against someone else. Being All I Can Be But Choosing to Be More is Good and Good is Good Enough.
I hope you see that God creates us the way we are for a reason. It may be that we are given handicaps, education opportunities or not, wealth or poverty, calm and soothing personality or a high spirited one, spiritual excellence or a work in progress, and on and on. Each one of us should realize if we do not feel we have to compete or challenge another one’s worth, we are rich within ourselves. Our Good is Good Enough. Thanks for allowing me to share my thoughts with you. Your own comments of personal growth are welcomed.
(C) Copyright 2012-2021 Arline Miller of Sipping Cups of Inspiration with all rights and privileges reserved. Third Party Material if known is sourced to original location and author for credit reference.
With some of my friends looking at the world of blogging, some of them seriously and some pondering the prospect of creating their own blog after guest blogging on my Sipping Cups of Inspiration, I thought this is perfect timing to bring Jordan Peters message, ANYONE Can Blog. This one is worth the read. I loved the reference it has to be a craving. I agree 100%. If you don’t have a true passion to build a blog with loyal and regular readers, do not attempt it. If, however, you have a true voice in whatever direction it follows, and you have the discipline to work at creating interesting, informative, funny, inspiring posts that catch readers’ attention……by all means, blog away. I love the diversity of blogging.
I encourage all aspiring bloggers to dive into Jordan’s blog as he knows the blogging lingo and has given us a lot of food for thought.
JUMPING ON AND OFF THE GOOD DEEDS WAGON is a look into how the disappearance of tradition and older values may have an effect on how we treat each other. It may not appeal to all of my readers but some will get the message, but it is one to provoke some thoughts on today’s world. Please join me on the blog and share it with others. #blog#amwriting#traditions#love#life#conservative#oldfashioned
JUMPING ON AND OFF GOOD DEEDS WAGON seems to be the popular theme in our world today. I want to open the discussion on whether or not it is best to maintain our values or choose the popular venue if it suits a certain issue to change how we appear to others.
Oh, I feel the hair rising on my arms as this one is a touchy subject. I will admit that I am a conservative value thinking person. I will sound bias in this discussion because I come from the old school of tradition, manners, family unity, and faith based values. I am not an old fogey however, and realize that I broke from some of the old traditions while maintaining some composure about changes. Let’s jump into this subject and maybe it will cause some thought provoking activity.
What caused the “say what you think even if it disrespects the listener” attitude?
Why are conservative values considered out of date by younger people?
Have we made progress or regressive action with the new ideas and policies?
Are we more united or divided by the actions demanding conservative values are not desired by the millennials and some younger people?
Did we gain or lose by loosening up the disciplinary ways of our parents and even us as parents?
Did we lose some of the values that have been practiced by the last generation in our path of “finding” ourselves?
I ask these questions to move our brain gears into movement. On the blog, I take us back to my good old days when tradition was honored, parents were respected, children were taught the value of faith, family, friendship, and community. Change is not all bad, but when changes distort our beliefs, values, and good manners, it can be very destructive.
I have attached a link to a great article and also the topics covered on becoming a better person. I believe in the goodness of humankind but I feel we are in danger of losing the very identity which makes us special and if we focus on returning to doing those acts of kindness and goodness, we will find a way to unite. Please click on the link if you want to read the entire article found in VeryWell Mind:
Our relationships can create a haven from stress, and help us to become better people at the same time. They can also be a significant source of stress when there is conflict that is resolved poorly or left to fester. The beauty of this is that as we do the work it takes to become a better friend, partner, and family member, it can also be a path to becoming a better person.
Some of what you can do to both improve your relationships and improve yourself is to learn conflict resolution strategies. Being a good listener,understanding the other side when you are in conflict, learning anger management techniques. These things can all help us to be better versions of ourselves. They can also minimize stress we experience in relationships and make them stronger. And close relationships usually provide plenty of opportunities to practice these skills as you work on improving them, so you can perhaps even appreciate the opportunities when they arise and feel less upset.
Maybe it is from researching, reading, writing, and blogging I have been exposed to more expression of thoughts. I recently read an article which leaned more favorable to liberalism and while I disagreed with a lot in the article, it gave me a better understanding of what liberals see conservatives as rigid, unfeeling, tight lipped, and non flexible and they actually see themselves in a freer soul, more emotional and caring, expressive, and even more lovable than conservatives. I thought I might take this thought and challenge it with a comparison of how it used to be when a death of a neighbor occurred and how today people react to the same occurrence.
When someone passed away when I was growing up, there was a lot of emotion attached to the departure of the relative, neighbor, co-worker, or church member. My husband and I had a recent conversation at the differences of then and now and it reminded me that I see the same differences occurring in our society. Let me show you what I mean:
When a person passed away, the church and neighbors gathered to decide where the food was going to be taken for the family and friends. It was not if you were going to take food, it was what are you going to take…….Question for you? With a few exceptions of some churches still carrying on this tradition, when have you seen this display of consideration for the grieving family?
When a person was buried in the cemetery it was customary to visit the graves and place flowers on a regular basis, especially the surviving family members. It was not if you were going to visit and take flowers but who was in charge of which holiday or special day of remembrance…….Question for you? When and whose grave do you visit and take time to show your respect and when was the last time you took flowers or placed a flag for the veterans?
When you have a friend that is facing death with a terminal illness or a lingering condition, it used to be people went to see their old friends and/or relatives. It seems as if people run from that responsibility of being a friend and want to stick their head in the sand. Question for you? When have you visited a school mate, a friend, a relative that was so good to you in years past when you found out they had cancer, other illness including dementia or Alzheimers? What is stopping you or me?
NOW FOR MY DEEPER THOUGHT: I am not sitting in a judgment seat or I would have to be found guilty too. I am pointing out one of the reasons I see a jump off the good neighbor wagon and I feel this has led to a demise of those traditions and good deeds since maybe our children and grandchildren haven’t seen us showing how much others mean to us. May we stop and blaming all of the divisiveness in our world on younger folks as we should first remember when we do something good…..we probably learned those good deeds from our parents. LIVE LIFE, LOVE LIFE, LIVE LIFE TO THE FULLEST BY GIVING OF OURSELVES SO THAT OTHERS WILL WANT TO MIMIC OUR ACTIONS.
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Sipping Cups of Inspiration welcomes Dean Hill, Guest Blogger and we wish him a very Happy Birthday! Let’s send his blog around the world by sharing it with friends. I think this is one of the best rewards of having the blog is to encourage writers, both pro and premier to spread their writer wings. #blog #amwriting #DeanHill #lifelessons #positivity #inspiration